Where's your empowerment?
What do you really want from your life?
Imagine you’re at the end of it, reflecting on the contributions you’ve made in the world. What do you want to be remembered for?
I don’t know what my list would have said 15 years ago, but I do know the one reason I wasn’t accomplishing any of it: I thought I didn’t deserve to be happy or do anything meaningful until I got my body under control.
How could I possibly be worthy of a loving relationship, a successful career, or complete financial security while living in this body? I really believed that, and I bet many of you do, too.
I experienced a big turning point when I was talking about someone in my life, and feeling so frustrated by the constant talk of dieting and judgement about body size. I blurted out in exasperation: “Why can’t he just accept the body he was given and just enjoy his life?!”
Right at that moment, I confronted a painful reality: I really believed that it was ok for him to live in whatever sized body he had, and still do important work in the world, because he was a man.
But deep down inside, I felt that it was my responsibility as a woman to look a certain way, to be appealing to the male gaze, to conform to what society expected of me as a compliant, pleasant, sexy, responsible woman.
Women of the world: having the perfect body does not make you happy. Sure, there are things about it that are fun -- like being able to buy whatever clothes you like, or temporarily attracting more attention from men -- but those things quickly fade, and you’re left with the stark reality that your body was never the problem, and you’ve wasted a hell of a lot of time thinking that it was.
I know this message won’t resonate with everyone, but there are plenty of women in the world who are ready to be done with this exhausting pursuit of thinness while their exciting, important lives pass them by.
Can you imagine how good it would feel to go on vacation and just have fun, without stressing about how much you’re eating or how good you look in a bathing suit?
Can you picture the joy of sitting down to a meal with friends, and laughing and talking about thoroughly enjoying every aspect of it, without privately adding up how much you’re eating or trying to talk yourself out of dessert?
Can you visualize waking up in the morning, and feeling great about yourself and your life regardless of what you ate the night before?
Do you want to set an intention for real happiness, peace, and joy and stop letting the scale dictate your self-worth?
Do you have any idea how liberating it is to declare that you love yourself no matter what, and you know you deserve happiness and love and joy and freedom regardless of the way you look or what size jeans you wear?
There are important things happening in the world right now. There’s a revolution in the works, women. We’ve been confronted with the very painful reality that we are still oppressed, and I bet many of us feel extremely powerless right now. Things are happening that we don’t have any control over, and we’re getting pissed off.
You don’t have to become a political activist, or rant on Facebook, or be angry. The real key to genuine empowerment is to realize your own worth, find your voice, and make an impact on the world in whatever way feels right to you. And you can’t do any of that while you’re frowning at the scale or counting points or agonizing over that slice of lemon meringue pie.
If you’re ready to learn how to take care of yourself, accept and support the body that you have, and liberate yourself to live your best life and do important things in the world, this is the time.