I was talking with a woman the other day, and she was telling me how she was planning to remodel her bathroom. She told me about all the difficulties she was going to face through the process, and expected it to take longer and be more expensive than the contractor promised. She told me she couldn’t wait for it to be over, and knew it wasn’t going to turn out like she wanted it to. She was dreading it, and assured me that it was going to be a huge pain in the ass.
When I gently suggested that maybe she could picture it going well and having the best possible outcome, she laughed in my face...like that was either totally impossible, or a waste of time.
It’s not hard to see how she is creating the negative outcome, right? She has a clear expectation of things going badly, and she always has plenty of evidence to support her theory. That’s how the Law of Attraction works -- you get what you ask for. If you think things are going to suck, they will.
I've Tried to Stay Positive, But Still Don't Have What I Want
You may be thinking, “But that’s not me, Teddey. I believe in the Law of Attraction and I think about what I want. I stay positive and expect miracles. So, why don’t I have everything I want?”
Because on some level, you’re resisting it.
What does that mean? Somewhere deep inside, you have a little lingering feeling that you might not get it, or that you don’t deserve it, or that it will be difficult to receive it, or that it might not be possible.
Why Would I Resist Something I Want So Badly?
We have all grown up with thousands and millions of negative messages in our lives, from our parents, teachers, leaders, advertisements...everywhere you look. Work is hard, money doesn’t grow on trees, don’t get too big for your britches, there’s no such thing as a free lunch.
We actually work very hard to keep ourselves in check, not expecting too much and not being too disappointed when things aren’t the way we want them. On some level, it’s a very powerful form of protection -- if we don’t expect too much, we won’t get let down. If we don’t get too excited and dream too big, then we won’t have major disappointments (or threaten people around us). The status quo may be very boring, but it’s also very comfortable.
So when you decide you DO want more, you ARE ready to dream big, and you WILL have what you want, it’s hard to immediately release all those limiting beliefs. All those negative ideas and admonitions are still bouncing around in your body and mind, and that creates major resistance to progress.
How Do I Stop Resisting?
You actually have to reprogram your thoughts, and release those limiting feelings from your energy.
Take a minute and do this exercise with me:
Get to a quiet place, and sit comfortably. Think about something you want. It can be anything from a new car, to a different house, to a loving partner, to a million dollars. Think about receiving it, and how exciting it will be. Think about living with that thing, enjoying it, and telling everyone that you have it. Picture yourself living your life, with that new thing center stage.
How do you feel? Excited, optimistic, energized? But pay close attention -- isn’t there also a little something else? Do you feel a little hesitation, or skepticism, or maybe even a bit of dread? Like getting what you want will be difficult, or cause problems, or is even impossible?
That’s your resistance. That little thread of hesitation, or that nervous flutter in your stomach. That negative thought creeping in telling you that you can’t actually have it, or that you don’t deserve it.
Getting to the heart of those limiting beliefs and releasing them is absolutely essential for effective manifestation. If you can, make a list of what kinds of resistance you experience. Sometimes it’s helpful to think about the worst case scenario: if I get the thing I want, then all these terrible things might happen. Write them down. Or maybe you make a list of all the reasons you can’t have the thing you want.
Tapping Actually Releases Your Resistance
Now, learn how to tap. If you haven’t done it before, there are several tutorials and examples of tapping / EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) on YouTube. I’ve found tapping to be an excellent way to acknowledge and release those deep, unconscious fears you have around receiving what you want. Of course your tapping procedure should be specific to your individual resistance, and you can customize it using the fears and limitations you’ve listed above.
Here’s a sample tapping script for resistance around receiving money:
[Tapping on the “karate chop” part of the hand], say 3 times:
“Even though I’ll never be wealthy, I completely love and accept myself.”
[Tapping on the various meridian points]:
"I’m not competent
I don’t deserve that much money
It’s not fair for me to have more than other people
I can never make that much money in my field
It will be so hard to make that much money
The economy is holding me back
My family has always been poor
I can’t imagine receiving so much money
I’m not responsible enough to handle that much money
I’ll surely waste it like I always have
Is it possible for me to receive that much money?
Is there a way I could make it work?
Maybe I do deserve it
Maybe there is enough for everyone
Maybe it is time for me to change my family pattern around money
Maybe I’m perfectly capable of managing money properly
Is it possible that my income is only limited by my beliefs?
Am I capable of earning that much money?"
Just keep going until you run out of steam. Let yourself really get into it and articulate all the fears that come up. I’m always surprised by the way I can go deeper and deeper through this process, and things I hadn’t consciously been aware of reveal themselves.
When you’re done, you may be tired, you may be angry, you may feel like you need to do it again, or you may be relieved. It may feel awkward at first, but this is a very effective way to release your deep resistance and start receiving that things you want. Keep trying it until you start to feel a shift.
Remove the Obstacles
When I first started to work with the Law of Attraction, I was very frustrated. I was trying so hard, and being so vigilant, but things were not coming together. I couldn’t understand why I wasn’t getting the things I wanted, because I really, really, really wanted them.
It turns out that wanting something is not enough. You have to be clear about what it is, believe you can have it, remove the obstacles standing in the way, and receive it gratefully. It wasn’t until I really understood that my resistance was a huge obstacle standing in the way that I made any progress.
It’s quite simple: wanting it brings it to you, and your doubt and fear push it away. If you simultaneously want something so bad you can taste it, but believe that you can’t really have it, you’ve canceled the manifestation. Tapping is a great way to release the doubt and fear, and clear the path for what you want to show up in your life.
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