The Food & Body Love Coach
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There's no right way to do this. No script to follow. It's sometimes messy and complicated and uncomfortable. But when I look back on the way I used to torture myself back when I was sure I needed to be skinny in order to be happy, there's no question I made the right decision.
Partners who haven’t had the same body image and food challenges you’ve faced still live in the diet culture we’re escaping from, and likely don’t understand the visceral need for freedom and peace with food that motivated you to take this journey. Or maybe they’ve faced exactly the same challenges you have, but just aren’t at the same point in their evolution.
It’s not about who’s suffering more. It’s just about recognizing that we all have varying advantages and people without the privileges you enjoy have a much different experience in the world.
“I get intuitive eating and I want to do it, but I just don’t know if it’s for me because I need to lose weight because my body hurts.”
We live in a world where it’s just a “given” that we are supposed to strive for smaller bodies, and it’s not possible to be healthy (or happy) in a larger body. Of course we want a peaceful relationship with food, but we’re not allowed to do that until we can get our bodies under control.
Nothing plunges you back into diet mentality faster than the risk of being criticized or judged for your current body by someone you haven’t seen for a while. Here’s how you can handle it.
Intuitive eating is about reconnecting with your internal wisdom about what your body needs and honoring your desires so you can feel peaceful around food. So, when you eat an entire pint of ice cream and your stomach hurts, instead of feeling that shame and regret of diet mentality, you can see it as a learning experience.
Nutrition is important. Exercise is important. Drinking water is important, for sure. But so is balance. So is mental health. And so is something we often overlook: feeling good.
We really want to believe that our problems will be solved if we can just do the thing: get more money, look different, buy that new car...whatever it is that we’ve decided will make us happy. But changing the external world without addressing the internal limitations is like sweeping the dust under the rug: it might look better for a short time, but the dirt is still there and will eventually make everything messy again.
You know how when you feel like you’re eating too much, you think the solution is to eat less? And then that doesn’t really work because the less you eat, the more obsessed you become with food? The more you diet, the more backlash binges you have.
Well, that’s what we do with money, too. The more you struggle, the more guilty you feel about spending. The more you deny yourself. The more you restrict and cut back and deprive yourself, and the more you reach for the credit card for some relief. At least that’s what I did.
"What I got with Teddey was guidance...to come out a stronger, more fulfilled person. I started out thinking I needed to fix my body and ended up making changes in self love and acceptance. It's a wonderful journey that any one who struggles with body image would be lucky to be a part of. I just wish I had done it sooner! " --LH
"I know that this will sound like hyperbole or cliche but working with Teddey has transformed my life for the better. While reaching out to Teddey was not an easy first step, it was the best thing I have ever done for myself. Together we walked through the steps of intuitive eating and got to the heart of many of my emotional stresses. Right from the beginning I was comfortable sharing with her because I could tell that she genuinely cared about my well being and she shared pieces of herself with me. She acknowledged my vulnerability and made me feel heard for the first time in my life. With her help I have been able to end my binge eating cycle and find a sense of peace with food and myself that I had nearly given up on finding. I have also learned through this process that investing in my emotional health is worth just as much as investment in my physical health. If you've been thinking about getting some emotional guidance I would encourage you to take that leap with Teddey." --CP